4 ways to prepare for divorce mediation

November 3, 2015

4 ways to prepare for divorce mediation

If you're preparing for a divorce mediation, check out some helpful tips below to prepare yourself.

4 ways to prepare for divorce mediation

1. Get organized

If you've decided to mediate, you're going to want to do all your homework before the mediation, so you're completely prepared for what's to come. Create a detailed, thorough, and comprehensive list of everything you own — both your assets and your possessions. Include things like your home, your car, credit cards, life insurance policies, stocks, valuables, etc. You will also want to have complete information about your income sources. Getting organized ahead of time will make the actual process go much smoother, and you will have fewer logistical details to worry about during a difficult emotional time.

2. Focus on your kids

Before your mediation, make sure you pay attention to your children and think about what they need and want. Divorce is nearly always hardest on the kids involved, and therefore, you want to make sure you are thinking about their needs as much as or more than your own. Spend some time with your kids talking about what they want and need, and put effort into not disparaging their other parent. Focusing on your kids is a good way to channel any negative energy into a positive outlet.

3. Set goals

Think about what you really want to get out of your divorce mediation. There will be both financial details that you want settled, and emotional needs or wounds you'll want to be healed. Be specific about what you really need and want from the proceeding, and then go into the process with these in mind. You don't want to go in with expectations that are too high or too vague and to feel disappointed about the outcomes. Focus on getting something concrete and actionable.

4. Commit to being cordial

You may dislike or have ill-will towards the person you're divorcing. In fact, you may feel like you hate him or her. But the best thing you can do in a divorce mediation is to commit to making it cordial and polite. Treat your soon-to-be ex-spouse with respect and professionalism, and do not bring negative energy or ill-will into the room. You will be surprised at how much better this makes everything for both of you.

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